Why is This Book a Best-Selling Relationship Book?
This book in the genre of best relationship books was written by Gary Chapman. He is a bestselling author and has excellent credentials in the realm of relationships. He offers uncomplicated advice that will be useful to people no matter what their relationship status is.
As we, mere mortals, try to navigate a path through life with or without a partner, it can only help us in our quest for love if we understand the languages of love. It could also help us to stay in love. If you are interested in this kind of books, take a look at our the best marriage counseling books, where you can find Chapman’s name as well.
Anyone, who has felt the exhilaration of falling in love, will tell you that it is effortless and addictive. However, keeping that love alive is an altogether different matter! Once your feet have come back down to Earth, it is not easy to navigate mundane, bland everyday life.
We all need some inspiration to keep giving and receiving love and keeping that flame alive. The 5 Love Languages book is contemporary and relevant. It also offers down-to-earth solutions that anyone can try. We also included in our selection to the best marriage books.
How Does it Work?
As always, love has to start with yourself. The ways that we express love for one another differs from person to person, but self- love is always the starting point. When you know what you need to love, you will then be equipped to start loving others.
We don’t all have the same love needs or the same love language, so it is important to learn your love language and the language of love of your chosen partner.
So, What are the 5 Love Languages of Which Chapman Speaks?
He uses the term “languages” loosely to mean communication. Not all communication is done using words. That would make having a loving relationship too easy! No, we have to learn a whole new way of communicating our feelings and ensuring that the message is received with clarity and appreciation from our loved one.
- Some people like to hear the words “I love you” being said aloud to them. They can also get the same message from praise, compliments, gratitude, and reassurance. Words of Affirmation could be the way you or your partner feel loved.
- Some people feel that just saying the words “I love you” is not enough to convince them that their feelings are sincere. They can be used flippantly to appease one’s partner, but if they are not backed up with the time and attention that the person needs to feel loved, then they do not achieve the desired effect. If you or your partner need to spend quality time together, then that is your love language.
- Whether this love language is driven by materialism or the need for concrete expressions of love, the giving and receiving of gifts can be a powerful love language for some. When a gift, whether it be big or small, is given in a caring and thoughtful manner, it can speak volumes about the feelings of the giver. Choosing something especially for yourself, your lover or your spouse takes time and thought, and that is what makes it such a wonderful love language.
- Performing acts of service can be a determining factor in career choice. For example, people in the medical and educational professions are seldom driven by financial rewards. Serving and helping others is their love language. This language can also be a strong binding force in a marriage or relationship because showing someone that they are loved by doing them a service will have a huge impact on the level of love that they experience as a result. Some acts of service can be small and thoughtful like helping with chores or supporting someone with a project. They don’t always have to be big gestures that require a lot of effort. As long as the receiver understands that love language, it is bound to be a winner.
- The final love language is touch. Unfortunately, many lovers jump to this love language first in the heat of passion, but then forget how important it is for the duration of the relationship. Human touch has been proven to cure several ills and it is vital for everyone from day one of their lives to the very end. Simple things like holding hands, kisses in all sorts of forms – as greetings, quick pecks, or long, amorous embraces, as well as warm hugs, can be just what some people need to satisfy the need for love.
What Do Couples Think of This Book?
Chapman makes it all sound so easy to restore, invigorate, or inspire lovers with The 5 Love Languages. However, some book reviews of The 5 Love Languages are far from flattering. Maybe because the obvious audience is the hetero-white-Christian group and does not apply to the many and varied types of relationships that exist in society.
Chapman is a self-proclaimed Christian and refers to the Bible throughout the book, which could be offensive to people of other beliefs or no beliefs at all. His case studies are limited to old-fashioned ideas of the dominant male and the submissive wife and some feel that this borders on misogyny. Perhaps an update of his view on gender roles would rectify this problem.
However, others have found the book to be a game-changer for their relationship and they have identified with The 5 Love Languages entirely. Because Chapman’s advice is easy to implement and addresses common relationship problems, it can be valid in many different types of relationships. If you like what Chapman got to offer, take a look at our The Five Love Languages book review.
Readers suggest that The 5 Love Languages book should be gifted to young people, newlyweds, and read by anyone who desires a successful relationship. It is well-written, offers good advice and it has become a bestseller for a good reason. That’s why we included Chapman’s work in our list of the best marriage books for couples. Check it out.